How I Work With Both of You: Selling a House During Divorce Without Taking Sides

If you're reading this, there's a good chance one of you found me first, and the other one is wondering whose side I'm on. That's a fair question. Here's my answer: the house's. My goal is to make this as low-stress and low-conflict as possible for both of you. The separation or divorce is hard enough. The sale doesn't need to contribute to it.

1. You both hear the same thing

The same email, sent to each of you separately. Not one group email. That way nobody has to watch a reply-all turn into an argument, and each of you can respond privately.
Separate calls, with the same information.
No side deals. I won't share what one of you says privately with the other, and I won't make decisions with one of you that should involve you both.

2. We agree on the plan before we list

Most of the conflict in a divorce sale comes from decisions that get made in the middle of it, under pressure. So we make them first, while things are calm:

The list price, and when and how much we'll reduce it if it doesn't sell.
An agreeable sales floor, the lowest price you'll both accept, so an offer doesn't turn into a fight.
How showings will work.
Repairs: what gets done, who handles it, and how the cost gets split.

Once those are settled, the sale mostly runs itself. (The House Decisions Worksheet walks you through all of it.)

3. Showings, handled fairly

You're both told about every showing.
The spouse living there gets notice within the time frame you agreed on.
Feedback is emailed to both of you, word for word.

4. Avoiding the "divorce look"

Buyers notice when a house looks half-moved-out: empty rooms, missing furniture, bare walls, a closet that's clearly only half full. To them, it says "motivated seller," and that invites low offers. I'll help you avoid it:

Keep every room furnished and finished, even if it means borrowing or rearranging a few pieces.
Fill the gaps on walls and shelves, or pare them down evenly so nothing looks missing.
Be careful what your closets communicate. Buyers open them. A primary closet that's half empty tells the story faster than anything else, so spread what's there out evenly or keep the doors closed with a tidy, full look.
Keep the yard, the cleaning and the small repairs up, even when nobody feels like it.

The goal is a home that looks cared for and complete, so buyers make offers on the house, not on your situation.

5. Your attorneys, on your terms

I'm happy to work with your attorneys or mediator as much as you want. But attorneys bill for their time, so I only reach out to them when you ask me to. That protects your financial commitment and keeps your legal budget for the things that need it.

I'm a real estate broker, not an attorney or tax advisor. How the sale fits into your divorce agreement is a question for your attorneys.

Common questions

Can one Realtor represent both spouses in a divorce sale?

Yes. When both spouses own the home, they're both the seller, and one listing agent works for both of them. The key is that the agent stays neutral, gives both spouses the same information, and doesn't take sides.

How do you keep both spouses informed?

I send the same email to each of you separately, so nobody gets pulled into a reply-all argument, and I follow up with separate calls. Showing feedback and offers go to both of you.

What should we agree on before listing?

The list price, when and how much to reduce it, the lowest price you'll both accept, how showings will work, what repairs get done, who handles them, and how the cost gets split. Settling these up front prevents most conflict later.

How do you handle showings if one of us still lives in the house?

You both know about every showing. The spouse living there gets notice within the time you agreed on, and feedback is emailed to both of you.

Will buyers know we're getting divorced?

They shouldn't be able to tell from the house. Half-empty rooms and missing furniture can signal a motivated seller and invite low offers, so I help you keep the home looking complete and cared for.

Do you talk to our divorce attorneys?

As much as you want me to. Attorneys bill for their time, so I only reach out to them when you ask me to. That way your legal budget goes where you need it.

Let's talk, separately or together

I'm glad to talk with each of you on your own, or both of you together, whatever feels easier. It's confidential, and you'll both get the same answers.

Contact Molly

Or call or text 217-493-6200.

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